Like always, I've been pretty busy, and tired lately from the healing process after the surgery. My work was wonderful last week and with a Dr.'s note, I was able to do some admin work around our center so I could heal completely, I was so thankful for that! It helped a lot and I was reminded how much I love admin work and seeing my kiddos. I am still healing, and there is still some soreness and pain after work especially, but overall, I'm feeling wonderful.
A little update on our paperwork: We sent in our application the day after my surgery, and received our dossier on Tuesday. Wow, talk about some paperwork and work in general for that! Every piece of paper has to be notarized and certified, it makes it espcially diffucult when we aren't the ones signing most of the paperwork, but the more I call around, the more I'm finding companies have their own notary, yay God!! Yesterday I sent in our homestudy paperwork and our last reference for the homestudy. Hopefully they will get that soon and we can start scheduling dates for them to come to our house :)
I had my spazout moment on Sunday, where I was overwhelmed with paperwork and frustrated, that I couldn't just get my birth certificate easier. I was venting to Kyle about how frustrating it is, that people just get pregnant, and they don't have to apply for anything, or prove that they are going to be good parents, but we do. We talked about a lot of things in that car ride, and we are both so sure that God isn't giving us more than we can handle.
Even this morning, we were talking about whether I would go back on medicine to help us have our own children, and we decided no. I know that may seem crazy, but for this past year, we have or should I say "I" have been trying to control this situation of bearing our own children. We decided its up to God, and maybe we aren't supposed to have our own, but we have the hearts for adoption. It is God's will, and as tough as it may be sometimes, He has a plan much bigger than we can see :) I'm excited and scared about that at the same time.
This has been a healing week for me, and I'm thankful for it. It has been hard times, and I've cried, and I've been excited. I can't wait to get this paperwork going, and see where this path takes us.
Love to all!!
Wednesday, August 31, 2011
Tuesday, August 23, 2011
The Love of Family
So I said I would update about a lovely conversation I had with my mother in law, Sandy. It was Saturday afternoon and I was feeling tired and honestly defeated about the information we got from the Dr. On Friday I had a great attitude about everything, but Saturday was just an off day I guess. Sandy called to check on me and see how I was feeling. She was telling me that she had done some research and found that a lot of people end up getting pregnant with only one tube and one ovary working. It was really nice to hear this stuff, because I hadn't done research and was feeling like it was impossible.
I was telling her how I just found out one of my best friends told me she was pregnant two nights before, and how excited I was about it!! :) She said I'm so sorry that you have to keep hearing about other people getting pregnant, and for some reason it's not you...yet. She had wise words though: I know how much I love my kids and I would never want to hurt them, and God loves you so much more and He isn't doing this to hurt you Megan. Maybe this is His way to remind you, that your turn will come and not to give up.
We continued to talk about things and how we both agree this will be a true miracle by God if we do end up pregnant, but she didn't end there. She said, even if you don't have your own and I so hope you do, you and Kyle are adopting. Honestly, there aren't many people your age that would do that.
It was such a good reminder, that God has placed this adoption on our hearts for a reason and He has a much bigger plan than any of us can see or even fathom. It was also a great reminder that our family and our friends are so supportive of what we are choosing to do.
So, thank you Sandy for your sweet words and your kind heart. Kyle and I have a great influence from you and Steve and we couldn't be more thankful for you both.
On Sunday night Kyle and I were searching around on Netflix and found a really neat documentary that we wanted to watch. It's called "God Grew Tired of Us." I will admit, I was really tired and thought I wouldn't be real into it, but boy was I shocked!!! This was probably the most amazing thing I had watched. It was about a group of boys called, The Lost Boys of Sudan. This group of boys, had to flee their beautiful and lush country because of a war. They fled to Ethiopia, but when their government went under, they had to flee again. They ended up in Kenya with not nearly as many boys as they had started out with.
They started their own village and they were all like brothers. There is an organization that brings some of the boys to the US to live here and to find jobs and give them opportunities. I won't go into too many details, but they follow 3 young men and the hearts of these guys were amazing. They would work 2 or 3 jobs and would send a lot of their money back to their village, or their family. They struggled with things in the US, like how rude people were, how they didn't get to see each other nearly as much as they'd like, and why we celebrate Christmas the way we do.
I laughed and I cried, and it was so moving and really made me think. At the end of it, Kyle and I looked at each other and wanted to adopt the young men in the documentary. It is very clear to us, that we are following God's leading right now and being obedient about the adoption process. It also made me think of how important it's going to be to spend good quality time with my family that we will soon have.
Another happy note, we will be sending in our Homestudy paperwork on Monday, and we got our Dossier yesterday. It is a lot of notarizing of papers and lots of typing, but I plan on being very diligent and getting it done quickly.
Sorry about the long post, but thanks for reading!! I am very tired from work today, so I'm going to rest and make some dinner.
I was telling her how I just found out one of my best friends told me she was pregnant two nights before, and how excited I was about it!! :) She said I'm so sorry that you have to keep hearing about other people getting pregnant, and for some reason it's not you...yet. She had wise words though: I know how much I love my kids and I would never want to hurt them, and God loves you so much more and He isn't doing this to hurt you Megan. Maybe this is His way to remind you, that your turn will come and not to give up.
We continued to talk about things and how we both agree this will be a true miracle by God if we do end up pregnant, but she didn't end there. She said, even if you don't have your own and I so hope you do, you and Kyle are adopting. Honestly, there aren't many people your age that would do that.
It was such a good reminder, that God has placed this adoption on our hearts for a reason and He has a much bigger plan than any of us can see or even fathom. It was also a great reminder that our family and our friends are so supportive of what we are choosing to do.
So, thank you Sandy for your sweet words and your kind heart. Kyle and I have a great influence from you and Steve and we couldn't be more thankful for you both.
On Sunday night Kyle and I were searching around on Netflix and found a really neat documentary that we wanted to watch. It's called "God Grew Tired of Us." I will admit, I was really tired and thought I wouldn't be real into it, but boy was I shocked!!! This was probably the most amazing thing I had watched. It was about a group of boys called, The Lost Boys of Sudan. This group of boys, had to flee their beautiful and lush country because of a war. They fled to Ethiopia, but when their government went under, they had to flee again. They ended up in Kenya with not nearly as many boys as they had started out with.
They started their own village and they were all like brothers. There is an organization that brings some of the boys to the US to live here and to find jobs and give them opportunities. I won't go into too many details, but they follow 3 young men and the hearts of these guys were amazing. They would work 2 or 3 jobs and would send a lot of their money back to their village, or their family. They struggled with things in the US, like how rude people were, how they didn't get to see each other nearly as much as they'd like, and why we celebrate Christmas the way we do.
I laughed and I cried, and it was so moving and really made me think. At the end of it, Kyle and I looked at each other and wanted to adopt the young men in the documentary. It is very clear to us, that we are following God's leading right now and being obedient about the adoption process. It also made me think of how important it's going to be to spend good quality time with my family that we will soon have.
Another happy note, we will be sending in our Homestudy paperwork on Monday, and we got our Dossier yesterday. It is a lot of notarizing of papers and lots of typing, but I plan on being very diligent and getting it done quickly.
Sorry about the long post, but thanks for reading!! I am very tired from work today, so I'm going to rest and make some dinner.
Sunday, August 21, 2011
Recovery
Just a quick update before I fall asleep :)
I am feeling much better today as far as moving around goes. I'm still pretty slow and slumped over a little bit to compensate for the pain in standing all the way straight up, but overall, I can get off the couch much easier than before. We went to TJMaxx today and Barnes and Noble, probably for an hour total and I was really tired. It's amazing how such a small surgery can make your body so weak and so tired all the time.
I'm so thankful for Kyle and all he has done and put up with the past few days. I will miss being with him all day when we go to work tomorrow. I am a little nervous to be back tomorrow, since I'm still healing and have open wounds around my abdomen, which is the spot where most of our kiddos are. I also get very tired pretty quickly, so some prayers for tomorrow would be lovely. :)
I will say, I imagine this is somewhat like a pregnant person feels like, in getting up off a couch or a chair, and sitting down as well. You can't just plop down anymore, it's funny. Hopefully I'm preparing myself for what that will feel like.
Time to say goodnight, but I will be posting about a lovely conversation I had with my spectacular mother in law and an extremely moving documentary Kyle and I watched this evening. :)
I am feeling much better today as far as moving around goes. I'm still pretty slow and slumped over a little bit to compensate for the pain in standing all the way straight up, but overall, I can get off the couch much easier than before. We went to TJMaxx today and Barnes and Noble, probably for an hour total and I was really tired. It's amazing how such a small surgery can make your body so weak and so tired all the time.
I'm so thankful for Kyle and all he has done and put up with the past few days. I will miss being with him all day when we go to work tomorrow. I am a little nervous to be back tomorrow, since I'm still healing and have open wounds around my abdomen, which is the spot where most of our kiddos are. I also get very tired pretty quickly, so some prayers for tomorrow would be lovely. :)
I will say, I imagine this is somewhat like a pregnant person feels like, in getting up off a couch or a chair, and sitting down as well. You can't just plop down anymore, it's funny. Hopefully I'm preparing myself for what that will feel like.
Time to say goodnight, but I will be posting about a lovely conversation I had with my spectacular mother in law and an extremely moving documentary Kyle and I watched this evening. :)
Friday, August 19, 2011
Pregnancy
Once Kyle and I began this process of adoption, I really thought my feelings of jealousy and being envious of people who are pregnant would really start go away. Sadly, sometimes I feel those creeping back up, but then there are other times when I couldn't be more happy for people. It is such a weird feeling, but I feel like it's getting better day by day. I am hoping this stays true for the days to come...
As many of you know, I had surgery yesterday. I wasn't nervous going in at all, I just wanted to get it over with and move on. I was wheeled back to the surgical room and it was freezing, I started feeling woozy and was asleep until 5pm. My Dr. was wonderful, she is very sweet and explains things very well. We are very thankful for her and how easy she is to talk to. She explained to Kyle and my mom everything that she encountered during the surgery.
She went in to take care of 2 polyps, a cyst on my ovary, and to clean out a fallopian tube. She ended up finding 3 polyps that were the size of marbles, and she was able to take care of another polyp that was a pretty decent size. So in all she scraped out 4 polyps and said that I would just be one of those women who would grow polyps. She took care of the ovary and said it was healthy and we had plenty of eggs. I also had signs of endometriosis and she was pretty sure I would develop this as time goes on. My right tube was blocked and she wanted to flush that out, but that didn't happen at all. The tube will never be open, in fact it's somewhat of birth defect. The right tube is closed off completely.
At this point Kyle and I have decided that it will be fully a God thing if we get pregnant. We both want it badly of course, but we are so thankful that God has put this heart of adoption in both of us. We will both be parents in some way or another, and we can't wait for that time to come! :)
I'm still very sore today, and it's hard to get up and walk around, but Kyle is pushing me and I'm very thankful for that. I have about 4-5 punctures in my abdomen, so it's very sore. It's amazing how much you use your abdomen until there are punctures in it. Ouch!
We will be taking it very easy this weekend, and hoping I can be back to work on Monday. I was feeling very nauseous all day, so I had Kyle reschedule our fingerprints. I was really bummed, but I knew I couldn't make it. We rescheduled for Sept. Hopefully tomorrow I can finish our homestudy paperwork and feel like I did something this weekend.
Thanks for all the thoughts, prayers, and comments! They are all so appreciated! :)
As many of you know, I had surgery yesterday. I wasn't nervous going in at all, I just wanted to get it over with and move on. I was wheeled back to the surgical room and it was freezing, I started feeling woozy and was asleep until 5pm. My Dr. was wonderful, she is very sweet and explains things very well. We are very thankful for her and how easy she is to talk to. She explained to Kyle and my mom everything that she encountered during the surgery.
She went in to take care of 2 polyps, a cyst on my ovary, and to clean out a fallopian tube. She ended up finding 3 polyps that were the size of marbles, and she was able to take care of another polyp that was a pretty decent size. So in all she scraped out 4 polyps and said that I would just be one of those women who would grow polyps. She took care of the ovary and said it was healthy and we had plenty of eggs. I also had signs of endometriosis and she was pretty sure I would develop this as time goes on. My right tube was blocked and she wanted to flush that out, but that didn't happen at all. The tube will never be open, in fact it's somewhat of birth defect. The right tube is closed off completely.
At this point Kyle and I have decided that it will be fully a God thing if we get pregnant. We both want it badly of course, but we are so thankful that God has put this heart of adoption in both of us. We will both be parents in some way or another, and we can't wait for that time to come! :)
I'm still very sore today, and it's hard to get up and walk around, but Kyle is pushing me and I'm very thankful for that. I have about 4-5 punctures in my abdomen, so it's very sore. It's amazing how much you use your abdomen until there are punctures in it. Ouch!
We will be taking it very easy this weekend, and hoping I can be back to work on Monday. I was feeling very nauseous all day, so I had Kyle reschedule our fingerprints. I was really bummed, but I knew I couldn't make it. We rescheduled for Sept. Hopefully tomorrow I can finish our homestudy paperwork and feel like I did something this weekend.
Thanks for all the thoughts, prayers, and comments! They are all so appreciated! :)
Wednesday, August 17, 2011
Home Sick
Today was supposed to be a day of eating lots of food and anything I wanted, since my surgery is tomorrow. I guess like most things I plan ahead of time, it's not quite working out. I was woken by terrible stomach pain at 5:30, and for good reason. I caught a little stomach bug of some sort. I sadly had to call into work today, which I was bummed about because I wanted to say bye to my kiddos. I'm hoping it goes away soon, so I can eat something yummy today at least.
While I've been on the couch though, I have been searching around and looking at baby bedding. It makes me want to create things, and decorate, and get ready for what is going to happen. I of course send some to Kyle as well, and he likes them, but also reminds me: "Megan, it's going to be like a year babe, and if you love something we will have to get it!" haha!! He knows me too well. So I have been writing items down and just enjoying it. We already know the base color palette we are going with, so it makes it so much fun.
I think I will agree with him and know that it is too early to decorate, but a girl can always look right?! :)
While I've been on the couch though, I have been searching around and looking at baby bedding. It makes me want to create things, and decorate, and get ready for what is going to happen. I of course send some to Kyle as well, and he likes them, but also reminds me: "Megan, it's going to be like a year babe, and if you love something we will have to get it!" haha!! He knows me too well. So I have been writing items down and just enjoying it. We already know the base color palette we are going with, so it makes it so much fun.
I think I will agree with him and know that it is too early to decorate, but a girl can always look right?! :)
Tuesday, August 16, 2011
Big Day
Today Kyle scanned all of our paper work so that we can have a copy of our paperwork and we are sending in our official application to IAN tomorrow. I am so excited to get that in and be finished with it. :) We will then get our dossier, so I can start working on that soon too. I am almost finished filling out our homestudy paperwork, which is part of the dossier, so it's kind of nice to have a little headway on that. I am hoping to finish that while I'm recovering on Friday and the weekend.
My surgery is in two days.... I'm not feeling too nervous, but there are parts bothering me: I can't eat past midnight on Wed. and my surgery isn't until 1pm and I am breakfast eater. I'm also really hating the thought of an IV, I don't usually get bothered by needles and such, but almost every IV I have had has hurt so badly, lets hope for some better luck on Thursday. The surgery should last about 1.5 hours and then the same amount of time for recovery, so it will be a long day to say the least.
I plan on eating as much as possible tomorrow :) I will also be cooking some things to put in the fridge, so that Kyle doesn't have to cook for himself or go out and buy food every night. I'm also making Oreo Truffles tomorrow... they are so yummy!! (They are for a friend, but I made some to test out this weekend, delish!)
Well, have a great week and I will post how everything went this weekend sometime.
My surgery is in two days.... I'm not feeling too nervous, but there are parts bothering me: I can't eat past midnight on Wed. and my surgery isn't until 1pm and I am breakfast eater. I'm also really hating the thought of an IV, I don't usually get bothered by needles and such, but almost every IV I have had has hurt so badly, lets hope for some better luck on Thursday. The surgery should last about 1.5 hours and then the same amount of time for recovery, so it will be a long day to say the least.
I plan on eating as much as possible tomorrow :) I will also be cooking some things to put in the fridge, so that Kyle doesn't have to cook for himself or go out and buy food every night. I'm also making Oreo Truffles tomorrow... they are so yummy!! (They are for a friend, but I made some to test out this weekend, delish!)
Well, have a great week and I will post how everything went this weekend sometime.
Thursday, August 11, 2011
Thankful Thursday
A couple things I am thankful for today:
* Thankful that God has put adoption on Kyle and I's heart, we truly feel blessed to have that wired in us.
* Thankful for Kyle in all of this, he has been my rock.
* Thankful for a loving, caring, and encouraging family as we head down this path.
* Thankful that Kyle and I both have good jobs.
* Thankful for the weather right now... It has been beautiful and I wish it could stay like this.
* Thankful for the mother who will be bearing our child, but loving her child enough to do what's best for them.
* Thankful for all the support from everyone.
Thanks so much everyone!! I hope you all have a wonderful day and weekend!
* Thankful that God has put adoption on Kyle and I's heart, we truly feel blessed to have that wired in us.
* Thankful for Kyle in all of this, he has been my rock.
* Thankful for a loving, caring, and encouraging family as we head down this path.
* Thankful that Kyle and I both have good jobs.
* Thankful for the weather right now... It has been beautiful and I wish it could stay like this.
* Thankful for the mother who will be bearing our child, but loving her child enough to do what's best for them.
* Thankful for all the support from everyone.
Thanks so much everyone!! I hope you all have a wonderful day and weekend!
Monday, August 8, 2011
Paperwork and Crafts
Well my once a week, didn't quite make it, but I was of course busy again last week. Not like the week before, but this weekend I went to Ohio to visit my amazing grandma with my mom. We went up to Lake Erie on Friday evening after I got off work. My mom and I talked and giggled almost the entire way up. Once we got into my grandmas, we stayed up until 12:30. Way past all of our bed times, but we had a great time catching up. Saturday and Sunday were just as wonderful, we made memories, laughed, cried, and talked about everything under the sun. I love the memories I have my grandma and I will hopefully never forget them. On Saturday at one point, she said, how fun is it going to be have a little kid running around here soon. :)
Of course the "soon" part isn't exactly a reality, but it will come more quickly than slowly I think. As I was finishing up our second application process through IAN (International Adoption Net) I had a couple questions, so I gave our placement coordinator a call. IAN has some amazing staff, and I never feel guilty giving them a call for a simple question. As we were talking, she was informing me that as soon as we send in our second application and we get our dossier, it could take as little as 6-8 weeks to get on the list. I was so surprised by this and so excited! We would still have to get some paper work through USCIS, that takes 8-10 weeks before we could get a referral, which is saying we have been matched with a baby, but the list for boys is 9 months and girls is 12. So we aren't too worried about not having that paperwork finished by the time we are added to list. As I said in an earlier post I thought this would take a couple months before we could get it finished and be on the list for a baby girl or boy age 0-24 months. So I was beyond excited to hear of this news.
Part of the dossier is our homestudy, so I have been filling out that paperwork as well, talk about overwhelming. :/ It will be worth it in the end for sure, but boy is it a lot of information!? Our homestudy will be done out of Indianapolis and they have to come to our house 3 times, at least one week apart. We have to get finger prints, background checks, and even CPS checks, it's a lot to do, but again will be so worth it. I'm going to try to schedule our fingerprints the day after my surgery, depending on how I feel. That way I have the day off already and it can be the one thing I do all day, and not have to take an extra day off.
Almost every night I have been working on paper work, asking Kyle, his family and my family a million questions.. thanks for being so sweet guys!! :) I have to pull myself away from the paperwork some nights, but then I go upstairs and lay in bed thinking about the paperwork and things that I could be doing to bring in a little extra money. This of course is an expensive process, and I love to do crafts and bake so I thought maybe if I do some of that on the side, it could help a little bit.
Here is what I like to do: make greeting cards, invitations, thank yous, or holiday cards. My mom is being really sweet and donating some cards and her time and resources to sell some cards as well. I recently got into making cake pops, it is very time consuming, but if I know enough in advance, it can be a pretty easy process. I have also been getting into knitting hats. I've mostly been making baby hats, but I have at least tried up to 3 sizes. My next goal is to try out scarves, so I can make some sets. I also made a couple of picture frame designs for some friends at work, but I have lots of paper and ideas I want to try out. Like for holidays, families, children's room. Diaper cakes are also something I love to do. I don't have any pictures because my phone erased all my pictures, but they are really cute and easy.
If any of that sounds like something anyone would be interested in, just let me know and we could get in contact. I'm going to post some pictures at the bottom to give you some ideas of what I'm talking about. You can leave a comment, message me on facebook or email me at: mchaffee12@gmail.com
I'm finding this process to be fun and exciting, but also very tiring. Which I guess is a great lead up to what life will probably be like with a child :)
Of course the "soon" part isn't exactly a reality, but it will come more quickly than slowly I think. As I was finishing up our second application process through IAN (International Adoption Net) I had a couple questions, so I gave our placement coordinator a call. IAN has some amazing staff, and I never feel guilty giving them a call for a simple question. As we were talking, she was informing me that as soon as we send in our second application and we get our dossier, it could take as little as 6-8 weeks to get on the list. I was so surprised by this and so excited! We would still have to get some paper work through USCIS, that takes 8-10 weeks before we could get a referral, which is saying we have been matched with a baby, but the list for boys is 9 months and girls is 12. So we aren't too worried about not having that paperwork finished by the time we are added to list. As I said in an earlier post I thought this would take a couple months before we could get it finished and be on the list for a baby girl or boy age 0-24 months. So I was beyond excited to hear of this news.
Part of the dossier is our homestudy, so I have been filling out that paperwork as well, talk about overwhelming. :/ It will be worth it in the end for sure, but boy is it a lot of information!? Our homestudy will be done out of Indianapolis and they have to come to our house 3 times, at least one week apart. We have to get finger prints, background checks, and even CPS checks, it's a lot to do, but again will be so worth it. I'm going to try to schedule our fingerprints the day after my surgery, depending on how I feel. That way I have the day off already and it can be the one thing I do all day, and not have to take an extra day off.
Almost every night I have been working on paper work, asking Kyle, his family and my family a million questions.. thanks for being so sweet guys!! :) I have to pull myself away from the paperwork some nights, but then I go upstairs and lay in bed thinking about the paperwork and things that I could be doing to bring in a little extra money. This of course is an expensive process, and I love to do crafts and bake so I thought maybe if I do some of that on the side, it could help a little bit.
Here is what I like to do: make greeting cards, invitations, thank yous, or holiday cards. My mom is being really sweet and donating some cards and her time and resources to sell some cards as well. I recently got into making cake pops, it is very time consuming, but if I know enough in advance, it can be a pretty easy process. I have also been getting into knitting hats. I've mostly been making baby hats, but I have at least tried up to 3 sizes. My next goal is to try out scarves, so I can make some sets. I also made a couple of picture frame designs for some friends at work, but I have lots of paper and ideas I want to try out. Like for holidays, families, children's room. Diaper cakes are also something I love to do. I don't have any pictures because my phone erased all my pictures, but they are really cute and easy.
If any of that sounds like something anyone would be interested in, just let me know and we could get in contact. I'm going to post some pictures at the bottom to give you some ideas of what I'm talking about. You can leave a comment, message me on facebook or email me at: mchaffee12@gmail.com
I'm finding this process to be fun and exciting, but also very tiring. Which I guess is a great lead up to what life will probably be like with a child :)
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